Don’t get me wrong, I love being retired. Well, retired from nights, weekends, and holidays, because I still do some work. Or what I refer to as “Worklike Activities” because I get paid pretty well to do something I enjoy, In addition to not involving nights, weekends, or holidays it also doesn’t involve heavy lifting. Literally.

I like being able to take time off pretty much on my own schedule. I like sleeping at home at night. I like eating regular meals uninterrupted by dispatchers.

I also like getting paid by my former employer to stay home in bad weather.

It’s mostly good.

Then, there are the downsides which pop up now and then.

I miss the camaraderie of the people I used to work with. Before COVID I would take advantage of the social engagements my former fellow employees used to hold. I’d go as often as I could and see former co workers still active and retired. COVID killed a planned “old timers” social function and we are just now starting to discuss actually doing that.

I miss being able to go to department training since much of that has moved on line and what isn’t has been restricted to active members because of “health concerns.” That might ease up after the summer, but since the training director retired a few months ago, it’s not clear. I still get more than enough on line continuing education, but I still enjoyed seeing the ever decreasing number of people I worked with.

Time moves on and after 10 1/2 years and counting of being retired 75% of the department might know me as a name, but not as a person. I see former department members who have moved on to some of my client fire agencies. We don’t have that much in common, but we do have some things. The training has changed, but the basics haven’t. I know who trained them because those are mostly now senior people, some of whom I trained and all of whom I worked with.

The department has changed, mainly because of city politics and there is nothing that will change that. As I said the other day to a now retired boss, it’s no longer our problem. He laughed and agreed.

Lately, the whole dynamic has changed and not in a way I like. Last year a co worker who started on the job when I did and retired about a year before I did died. I thought he was a few years older than I, but it turned out that he was three months older. Yikes. As happens, a lot of retirees (old guys) showed up for his Wake and funeral.

A few years before that two people who retired died a few months after their well earned retirement. Both were close to me in age and both had worked hard during their careers to help patients and improve the department. Both were good folks and deserved that retirement only to be robbed of it by illness and death.

Then, a week ago, we were informed that another retiree, one with whom I had worked for 30 years and who retired about five years ago died of cancer. He and I worked together on and off over the years and for several years worked different shifts at the same station.

He was really enjoying his retirement and looked forward to his son getting married in the near future. Which would likely have meant grandchildren in the near future and he’d love that.

The “Celebration of Life” was this past week and again mostly attended by retirees who had worked with him for years, plus the department Honor Guard. It was a moving ceremony and the testimonials by family and friends were well crafted and beautiful.

Then yesterday afternoon, we were informed that a still active, but close to retirement department member had died suddenly. No details of what happened yet, but in truth it doesn’t matter. Another hard working friend gone too soon.

I know that it happens to everyone and some day (too soon) it will happen to me. Still, I feel that my friends were all cheated out of what they had earned.